Back to blogging

So, I've returned back to blogging - why? because I need an outlet, an outlet where I can say what I want without being put down, just to write all my thoughts with having to hold my tongue, my thoughts aren't just free in my mind now but within the vortex of the internet.

Well, I'll just tell you about my day today, where I did something wrong and truly believe I tried to do the right thing to fix it.

So, I was meant to have biology from 2PM till 3PM, I read my timetable wrong and thought it was 3-4. So, I went to college at 3 and my class were leaving so, I asked a class mate,

has biology been cancelled? he said "no" so, I said why is everyone leaving then? he said, the lesson was from 2-3. Shock horror I had missed the lesson.

So, I walked into the classroom and explained myself I told my lecturer, I had read my timetable wrong and I was sorry. I quote this is what he said "Well, I'm not impressed Janny, I cant even pretend to be upset" so, I said Sorry again, and he said "well that's it". I feel guilty for missing the lesson, it puts me at a disadvantage but even though he probably is allowed to be annoyed don't you think I've done the right thing?

Tomorrow, morning I have double biology first, I hope he doesn't hold a grudge and i hope that he doesn't shame me in front of the whole class.

Please pray for me.

Love,

Janny

Universities?

When September 2011 whizzes round, I hope to go to university and do my degree in English literature and then a PGCE or maybe an adult version so, I can teach in schools and colleges.

But the problem is -

I want a good uni

A good enjoyable course

Not too far from home (so, I can commute from home by train or car)

and I could experience.

Today, is weigh day "weigh day Wednesday", I hope I have lost a pound, I've been okay this week with food. I just want to get to my 1 and half stone award soon!

Hope you are all well,

Janny

P.S I think I'm addicted to caffeine.

Hii

Hi, I've lost a stone and 1/2 a pound, 14 and 1/2 pounds. I'm getting wieghed again tommorow so i'm hoping for a loss.

Hope you are all well

Janny

P.S - For my 1st year A-Level results I got a 'C' grade in biology and a 'B' in Psychology :)

Nearly A Stone

Hi,
I've lost 12poundss now, if I loose 2 pounds this week i will have lost a stone (14ponuds) so excited.
I've really been neglecting my blog lately, I will post some pictures of my healthy meals soon!

Neways take care,
Janny.

A New Me

Salaams and hello,
time has passed since my last blog sorry, I've been so busy with college its unbelieveable. I hope you've all been well.

Well, this new is about me actually going on a diet to lose some and getting somewhere, I've joined a wieght loss group, Slimming World and its actually working. I've lost 1/2 a stone (7 pounds) in 3 weeks aiming to loose a stone in 6 weeks. Its great because this is no extreme diet its just healthy eating abit of everything is allowed.

Neways, i must be off now i've got 3 pieces of coursework to do before the 12 of febuary so, time is of the essence!

Take care, i will try to write soon
Janny

A Letter For A Lover

Dear Lover,

We fell in love blind to each other, we couldn't see each other or ourselves. We brung out parts of ourselves with each other that no-one else ever saw. You took away my anger and taught me patience. I wanted to tell you sometimes about your mistakes, how they pricked at my skin, planted themselves carefully in places that hurt, how this irritation grew but I couldn't. Your voice washed it all away, water will always over power anger and you will over power me. Rule my heart.

Little things add up to something big but everything thing that can be counted should not always be counted because that petty. So, the countless mistakes you made, I ignored them, because I do not want our love to be petty. I want it to be strong, true, pure. You say i'm weak and a pushover because I let you get away with things?? I don't let you get away with them, I forgive you immediately because I love you. I could be brutal, harsh but it would hurt me to know I hurt you, wasted time being horrible to you when I could've spent that time loving you.

You love is my weakness. It silence's me, when I should shout. It paints over sadness with a smile. But its my biggest strength, Why? Because its something closest to me, my greatest alibi in life, making life worth living, something so wrong but so right, something that puts this barren world in to technicolor, devours evil and anger and replaces it with happiness.

But, you are arrogant, stuck-up, mad and a disgustingly beautiful person. You make me sick. You drive me insane, everything that should make you revolting but only makes me love you more. Any person with two brain cells, would tell you to stick it where the sun don't shine but I can't. Neither can I leave you because i see it as abandoning you and there is some pull, I don't know what like a magnetic field that draws me back too you and only you. Its beyond my understanding to be honest.

Maybe, its all just destined. Me and you. Maybe, this is a test? Or the end?

You broke my promises, and I couldn't take it any more, everything got so much so, I turned away. Just for a second. I didn't leave you as you say, you broke me. Yeah, your promise was just words, words that can be used over and over again, in so many ways, but they meant alot to me. Trust takes years to build but a second to break if you can break one promise what means you cant break another?

In my eyes, we are still together, hanging, but still intact, to you, we are two pieces of thread. but does a seconds mistake break everything we have? What about all them mistakes you made? What if I punished you for them? What if they had the same consequences?

You want time to decide, decide then, but You don't have forever, I'll learn to live without you even if it hurts everyday for the rest of my life.

Have it your way.

Love from

Your Whatever.

The blindness Of People

People can be blind in many ways, the ignorant are blind, the arrogant are blind, the rich are sometimes blind because they forget to see that the people around are equal or even a better person than them.

They all forget that we are human, that money comes and goes, Education and Intelligence can be attained by anyone, the arrogant talk about "equality" of races but don't see the inequality of the their actions.

I know someone who's well off and has been to umrah but always seems to go to the "better off " relatives houses the one's with big houses and fast cars instead of her own sister's who may live in a small house and drive an average car but prays for her the most.

Its sad to think that people become blind and forget.

People. What happens?